Dear Seed Companies

High Mowing Seeds, Fedco and Baker Creek Heirloom: I have a bone to pick with you.

Taunting me with seed catalogs is just cruel and unusual punishment, and–if I’m not mistaken–I believe our constitution expressly prohibits cruel and unusual punishment. The luscious fruits and vegetables, the pictures of green, red, yellow, purple are just too much for me right now.

You see, I’m buried under 2 feet of snow and it’s still coming down like there’s no tomorrow. It seems like spring will never, ever come. That there will never be a time when white stuff doesn’t cover the ground.

It’s going to be a long assed winter, so I respectfully ask you hold your catalogs until March. Yes, I know that defeats the purpose, but, you see, seed catalogs in December is just salt in my wound.

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