Last night was the full moon. Usually I head over to Silverwolf Sanctuary to worship with my grovemates but last night I didn’t go.
I had no “real” reason. I was really, really drained. I just wanted to sit and rest for while which is exactly what I did. And then the Chicken Ladies became imperiled. I wonder if the reason I didn’t feel like going was because something told me to stay home and protect my homestead-ette.
Certainly I’m sad I didn’t go last night and worship with my beloved grovemates but now I know I made the right decision.
Today I am recovering from the adrenaline hangover. I’m more drained than I was yesterday but that’s ok. I protected my chickens. I made a stance against the fox and told her to back off. I’m sure she’ll come back now that she knows chickens live here. Wolf has told me he’s going to teach me to use the bow though I am very, very reluctant to learn how to kill.*
As Wolf and I were drifting off to sleep last night I started panicking about Myron. Myron is the male turkey (I think it’s a male) who’s taken residence in the woods around our house. We see him all the time walking up and down the driving, traipsing through the yard, etc. Then, of course, I started freaking about the cats. Then I thought we should move back to the city because I don’t think I can handle the Chicken Ladies getting eaten by anything but me. Thus, getting to sleep last night was not easy. And then I started have weird dreams about walking through Lexington and panda bears. This whole episode has me all out of sorts.
Yes, I know it’s all part of the web of life but…
*Actually, I told Wolf I won’t be able to do it. What if it’s a mama fox? What if her pups are still feeding? Why should they starve to death because *we* killed their mama? I just can’t do it. I can’t kill the fox, regardless of its gender.