There’s a song with that line in it. I can’t think of the title or the artist right now because I’m all whacked out on Scooby snacks.
Back in February I was told by my dentist I had a cavity which needed filling. Dutifully I set up an appointment. At the time I was going to Gentle Dental in Tilton. Honestly, I was never particularly pleased with the care I got there but I only went in twice a year so I didn’t bother finding a new dentist until I had to get my cavity filled.
I walked into the office and the 20 year old poptart said to me “um, like, you know, I, like, can’t like, do this until you, um, like, I don’t know, you know? Like, take out the tongue ring.
Now, I had the tongue ring for over a decade. Never in all that time had anyone asked me to take it out (dentists, hygienists, doctors, etc). Yet every time I went to Gentle Dental the hygienist (who talked nonstop about her kids, lactation, pregnancy, and childbirth) asked me to take it out and each time I refused which I saw her chart. Taking out the stud, I told her repeatedly, was a pain in the ass. It’s hard to get the ball to screw off and harder to get it to screw on. Besides, when fiddling with it doing so causes my tongue to swell so getting the stud back into the hole is even more difficult because the stud is short. And, by taking it out repeatedly, the ball and stud become stripped and the ball falls off. I know this because I’d swallowed balls in the past and I wasn’t willing to do it again.
So when the poptart gave me the “like, um, you know” speech, I glared at her, attempted to take it out, told her I couldn’t get the ball off because I’d used a pair of pliers to get it as tight as I could to keep it in my mouth and then told her I would find another dentist because the care I received was substandard; their policy regarding tongue piercings was made without any consultation with the patients are have tongue piercings, nor any notice; it seemed the dentist has a personal hatred of them and demanded — unreasonably — they must be taken out without any consideration of the patient; and dentists were a dime a dozen so I’d find another; and that I was NOT paying for the appointment and then I left.
I found a new dentist (right across the street from Gentle Dental) and set up an appointment. I brought in my records from the previous (substandard) dentist and told the new dentist (who is ooh laa, laa hot) of the cavity. He drilled and filled it. And the saga began.
Within a few days my jaw was killing me. I couldn’t close my mouth nor chew on the right side of my mouth (I’m a right sided chewer), nor drink any cold fluid without intense pain. For the next couple weeks he would adjust the tooth by drilling and filing down the ridges in attempts to get my bite right but nothing was eliminating the pain (though my bite was back to normal) so I went and got myself a second opinion.
Dr. Second Opinion, a nice old man who was so warm and caring (and gentle!) I wanted to move into his office. But he was almost an hour away so I knew I wouldn’t be a patient of his. He diagnosed me with “cracked tooth syndrome” saying the problem was a micro-fracture which was open just enough so the nerve was irritated every time I bit down or drank something cold. The filling, you see, had wedged the crack open just enough so cold stuff could get in there. He sent me down to an endodontist down in Concord to talk about a root canal.
Dr. Root Canal examined my tooth (number 30 if you’re wondering) and couldn’t determine if I needed a root canal or not. The x-rays were indeterminate and the tests inconclusive. By this time it was about June or so and I’d been in pain since February. I was getting a little irritated to say the least.
Dr. Root Canal sent be back to Dr. Ohh Laa Laa, who put a crown on the tooth. The pain went away for about an hour but still I couldn’t eat on the right side and cold fluids were akin to having a spike drilled through my jaw and up to my brain. I called Dr. Ohh Laa Laa back last week and said “yea, it still hurts.” He sent me back to Dr. Root Canal.
Yesterday I had the root canal done. I’m in pain but a different kind of pain. It was supposed to take 2 hours to get the root canal done but took almost four because the root was inflamed and wouldn’t stop bleeding. Have you ever had your mouth pried open for four hours? Let me tell you how sore my jaw is. Not only that, the Novocaine didn’t work well on me (it never does) and despite taking two Xanyxs I was still anxious which doesn’t help with pain.*
Wolf left work earlier yesterday to take me home because I can’t drive after taking two Xanyx. When I got home he made me some chicken noodle soup and I popped a Tynelol with codeine and went to bed. I woke up around 9p, got something to eat, took a couple more Xanyx and went back to bed. Today I’m a foggy mess to say the least!
I still can’t eat on that side, not even blueberries, but that’s because my jaw is still soar as hell and I have a temporary filling in no. 30. On Monday I have to go back to Dr. Ohh Laa Laa to get a permanent filling and hopefully that will be the end of the saga.
*Nor does the Novocaine really. You see, Novocaine has epinephrine in it. Epinephrine is a stimulant thus it makes your heart beat faster. When you’re in pain you want your heart to beat slower (which is why it’s easy to OD on pain killers) not faster because faster means more anxiety and more pain.