Continuing my updates on the Doing Not Thinking Challenge: Not much running got done. Thus, this weeks Doing Not Thinking Challenge is brought to you by the letter F for Frustration.
Friday of last week I just never motivated myself. Saturday and Sunday were never going to happen so I’m now “allowing” myself to have the weekends off so I don’t feel bad about not running. Monday was a day to run but I didn’t. Tuesday I didn’t run either, however I did walk my running route. My heart rate was up for a short while so that counts for something, right? Wednesday I went for a walk which turned into a small run. I didn’t stretch at all but that seemed to be ok that one time. It’s good my body asked me to run despite my brain wanting a walk, right?
Thursday I did run and run I did! Earlier in the night (like 1am) Wolf and I went on a call with the Fire Department. It was a “good call” which required us to use a lot of our skills and move quickly. We got home around 3am and Wolf stayed up since he had to go to work and I went back to bed after drinking some tension tamer and catnip tea. I slept fitfully for a few hours then got up and ran. I ran all the way to the fire hydrant which is the furthest I’ve run thus far, then I ran a few more times after taking some walk breaks. Man, adrenaline is an amazing drug. No one we foolish humans try to recreate it with illicit drugs! There’s nothing like it!
I’ll tell ya, there’s nothing like a “good call” to get me motivated once again! I was feeling so damned frustrated with myself. So frustrated I wrote this
This is where the frustration comes in. I’m frustrated with myself. I *want* to run I just don’t actually do it. I don’t know why. Oh sure, I think about it and chide myself for not but actually motivating myself to run, well that’s a whole new ball of wax.
Obviously I can’t count on my community to have unfortunate events to propel me into running so I need to find something else to motivate me and un-frustrate me. What I’d like is a running partner, someone who’s in the same shape as I am. In the past I’ve tried to work out with people in better shape than me and I just got frustrated because I couldn’t maintain their pace and they wouldn’t slow down because they felt I *could* keep up if I just “tried harder.”
One day at a time I guess. And I’m not good with “one day at a time.” It takes too long =)
Today is Friday and I’ve not run since it’s raining out. I really hate being outside in the rain. It’s cold and wet and I hate being cold and wet. Also, because I did three days of walking/running I feel good about not running today. I won’t be running tomorrow or Sunday either so maybe I should try and motivate myself to get out there tomorrow but I won’t beat myself up about it if I don’t.